REQUITED, UNREQUITED LOVE!
Incapable of loving until you came around…….
I have tried long and hard enough but I can’t give you the love you truly deserve. With every passing second, my feelings for you grow thinner.
I have tried to fan the flame between us alive only to blow it out the next second.
I have sought for ways to keep the fire alive between us but maybe there was no spark in the first place.
Maybe it’s all been one sided. Maybe you love me more than I can ever love you back. Maybe the love you show me forces me to love you, but out of pity. Maybe you have more to lose.
Maybe you poured so much into this love affair that I don’t see the need to do much of anything. Maybe you said I love you first, too early that I couldn’t bring myself to break your heart, to burst my bubble.
Or maybe you are just too obsessed with the idea of love, with me that it became suffocating, impossible to match up. You give too much too early. I know how much you wanted this, I know how much you invested in this, I know how much you gave up for this. For me.
No, don’t call me selfish or ungrateful, we both know I’m not any of those.
Or maybe I’m just so incapable of loving. I’m just as incapable of love as a leopard is of changing its spots.
How do I explain that I want you now and later I want out? How do I explain that I need you more than air and the next I can’t stand you? How do I explain how badly I want to breathe in your scent, drench myself in your presence and the next minute, I can’t bare to look at you?
How did I get here? How broken do I have to be for me to have not even a bit of my heart muscle beating for you? How incapable of loving did I get?
Or am I just unworthy.
Ohhh, I know you deserve better than this stuck up, one sided, breadcrumbing kind of love that I can offer.
You deserve someone who looks at you with dreamy eyes and won’t stop telling you how much you mean to them. You deserve someone who would love you for who you are and not what you can give.
You deserve someone who loves you with every fiber of their being so much that they can't breathe when you’re not near. You deserve someone who can’t get enough of you.
You deserve a love so complete, so intentional, so pure, so true, so divine, so safe, consistent, sacrificial, requited. You deserve better. Better than this unrequited love.
Can’t you see you deserve better? Why’d you keep running after me? Why’d you still keep holding on in hopes that I’d change my mind?
You don’t give up on me and I’d be a fool if I did too.
If I could love you a little bit more. A little bit deeper.
Maybe if I love you a little bit more, I’d be more deserving of you.
If I could love you a little bit more, just maybe I could learn to love you right.
If I loved you a little bit more, just maybe I’d wake up every morning yearning for you, desperate to hear your voice and feel you near.
If I loved you a little bit more, just maybe I’d stop hurting you.
If I loved you a little bit more , just maybe I wouldn’t run off at the slightest inconvenience.
If I loved you a little bit more, just maybe I’d break down the walls I built to keep you out but close enough.
If I loved you a little bit more, just maybe I’d spend more time getting to know you, breathing in your scent and understanding your heart.
If I loved you a little bit more, just maybe I would come running when you call.
If I loved you a little bit more, just maybe I’d spend more time learning about you. Spend more time pleasing you.
If I loved you a little bit more, just maybe I’d do more things that made you happy.
If I loved you a little bit more, just maybe I’d take you everywhere with me just to keep you as close to my heart as possible.
If I loved you a little bit more, just maybe I’d listen to you more.
If I loved you a little bit more, just maybe I wouldn’t make excuses to leave you.
If I loved you a little bit more, just maybe I wouldn’t stand you up on our date nights.
If I loved you a little bit more, just maybe I would be better for you.
If I loved you a little bit more, just maybe I would be a bit more intentional about you and the things you love.
If I loved you a little bit more, just maybe I would tell more people about you and how pure your heart is and how fiercely you love.
If I loved you a little bit more, just maybe I would sing more of your favorite songs or even write you more love songs and letters.
If I loved you a little bit more, just maybe this love wouldn’t be unrequited.
If I loved you a little bit more, just maybe I could love like you. I could trust you a little bit more.
If I loved you a little bit more, just maybe I could love the things you love and hate the ones you hate.
If I loved you a little bit more, just maybe I would make you smile, make you proud.
If I loved you a little bit more, just maybe I would read about you and meditate more often.
If I loved you a little bit more, just maybe I wouldn’t be scared to be seen trying to love you.
If I loved you a little bit more, just maybe I wouldn’t care what people say.
If I loved you a little bit more, just maybe I wouldn’t forget all the sacrifices you had to make for me.
If I loved you a little bit more, just maybe I would be more trusting me.
If I loved you a little bit more, just maybe I wouldn’t take you for granted. Take your grace for granted.
If I loved you a little bit more, just maybe I’d never take my eyes of you, gazing at your beauty, stealing glances at you every chance I get. Standing in awe of you and getting lost in the splendor of your majesty.
If I loved you a little bit more, just maybe I would live more righteously.
If I loved you a little bit more, just maybe I would love like you.
If I could love you a little bit more, just maybe I’d reciprocate more of your love.
God if I could love you a little bit more, maybe I’ll learn to love me like you love me.
God if I could love you just a little bit more, I’d love more like you and less like the world’s tainted idea of love.
God if I could love like you I’d love the 1Cor 13:4-8 way.
If I could love just a little bit more, 1John 4:8-10 would be easy.
Because while I was a sinner and incapable of love in Romans3:23 until you showed up in Romans 3:24 making me capable of requiting the one sided love you first showed me. From unrequited love to requited love. A love that goes both ways!
Now I can be capable of your kind of love. Unconditional love. Sacrificial love. Reckless love. Requited, unrequited love!
Requited by unrequited love!
